Love Is Within Yourself: A Story of a Life Lost, Found, and Changed

Two days ago, I decided to enter a contest in I Commit to Change which requires me to write about an inspiring story in my life which changed me. I decided to write because if I win an iPad that would really help me in my advocacy and in what I do as a writer. Here is that story in my life which have changed me.

Love Is Within Yourself: A Story of a Life Lost, Found, and Changed

(originally posted in my Facebook Notes)

I was born without a dad since he died when I was only 5 months old in my mother's womb. Later on my mom died when I was five years old from cancer of the liver. I never knew what love is and how it feels to be love by parents. Since then I was raised by my grandmother and my life with her had never been easy.

I suffered a lot of physical and verbal abuse during that time. I felt that I was never loved and I felt lost every single day of my life. One time when I was in Grade 4 I decided to commit suicide and lock my room. When I am about to commit suicide, our neighbors radio played a song which really touched me. It was, "The Greatest Love of All." Then I realized, that finding love does not mean looking for somebody to give it to you but you can start it by loving your self. And so from there on I decided to look better about myself and avoid self pity.

The trials never stopped there. During the course of three years, I suffered from sexual molestation not only once but three times. This event shattered me and once again brought back questions on why these things should happen to me. I even blamed God for these things. I never went to church and never prayed.

One night, the terrible feeling that haunted me years ago came back and this time I told myself that I will really do it no matter what. This misery had to end. I once again decided to commit suicide and end my life. Just at the very moment I am about to make it, that same neighbor in the middle of the night turned on her radio and once again the song struck me.

"There's a hero if you look inside your heart. You don't have to be afraid of what you are. There's an answer, if you reach into your soul and the sorrow that you know will melt away."

I stop what I am about to do. I throw away the knife and from there on told myself that whatever happens, it happens for a reason. I would be a coward by doing what I am planning to do. My problems and all of my sufferings does not justify what I am about to do. I commit to change the way I view things and sufferings in life. I will always try to find the positive things in life and in everything I do and for sure I will never feel sorry again.

That day made me stand all the trials in my life up to this day. There had been countless problems in my life even greater than what I experienced before but I stood strong and unwavering for one reason... Life is beautiful and in all bad things there is always a spark of the good and the positive. From that positive thing will come the best of what life has to offer me.

Today, I have three lovable and intelligent kids and a woman who loves me more than I can ever imagine. She keeps me stronger and better each day.

Thanks and I hope my story would inspire those that would read this. Life is a gift, treasure it for once lost it will never come back.

David "Dave" D'Angelo

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